


pretty thoughts

by pendragonpants



Category: Endeavour (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Fluff, Head Injury, M/M, Marriage, Peter Jakes Whump, not that bad though
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-08 20:09:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,400
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27082441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pendragonpants/pseuds/pendragonpants
Summary: Today, they were going to get married. They had been waiting for this day for the longest time. It was Jakes who had proposed to Morse and he was overjoyed when the answer was yes.It is Jakes and Morse's wedding day. But is it really what it seems to be?
Relationships: Peter Jakes/Endeavour Morse
Comments: 5
Kudos: 20





	pretty thoughts

**Author's Note:**

> The title comes from 'Pretty Thoughts' by the Pansy Boys. I'd recommend listening to the song as it's really gorgeous! Enjoy the fic <3
> 
> This has not been beta'ed so all mistakes and typos are mine! Let me know if they are any, I'll fix them as soon as I can.

_It was just a dream,  
But ain't it pretty to think so?  
But It was just a dream…_

Jakes straightened his tie, smoothing down the imagined creases on his suit jacket and buttoned it up slowly. He stared at himself in the mirror, not recognising the man who stood before it.

A well-dressed healthy male stood before him, one who didn’t have dark purple circles under his eyes, one whose cheeks were not sunken and one who looked at ease and happy. He breathed out a sigh of relief because the man looking back at him was himself. 

Three months ago, if someone had told him he would have looked like this now, he would have scoffed and laughed out loud. It seemed impossible at that time because he was overwhelmed with stress, with repressed memories and fear. 

It all changed when he met Morse. Initially, he did hate the smart bastard, he won’t deny that, but eventually, he grew to admire the opera-loving man. He was extremely curious about how he could solve so many cases in so little time and how that man had so many brushes with death.

He could clearly picture the day he lent Morse his shirt after he was stabbed by Mason Gull. He had watched Morse carefully, putting on a cold facade but all he wanted to do at that moment was reach out and console Morse and hug him and place kisses against his clean-shaven face.

He was repulsed with himself at first but he knew it was this internalised homophobia that made him deeply unhappy. Who knew? Maybe Morse was like him. He didn’t feel certain and was not comfortable asking him about that. 

It all changed when the two of them were assigned to find a missing girl, Verity Richardson, stolen from her bed in the middle of the pitch-black night. They discovered her bound and gagged in some catacombs underground and although they managed to push her out before the tunnel collapsed, Morse and he were trapped. 

It was there they shared their first kiss.

*

_“Jakes? Jakes! Jakes, are you okay? Come on, wake up!”_

_His head was pounding and Jakes coughed, eyes smarting from the dust and sand that was clouding his vision. He touched his forehead and winced when it stung. His hand came away bloody and red._

_“Jakes, you’ve got a small gash in your forehead. Easy now, we’re trapped under the rubble. The rest of the team should have heard the explosion, hopefully, they’ll find her and get us out.” Morse didn’t sound so confident though and Jakes was dizzy and the situation had not fully registered with him._

_“Morse? Are you alright?” He asked, keeping his fingers crossed that he was uninjured. He had no medical experience and probably couldn’t do anything to help the other man if he was harmed._

_“I’m fine. Just a little uncomfortable. It’s quite tight underneath all this...” He gestured his hand towards all the rocks._

_Jakes scanned the area, boulders and bits of the building were strewn around them and it would have been impossible to see anything if it wasn’t for Morse’s torch. It gave the area a warm glow yet it flickered every so often, threatening to go out._

_The space that they occupied was about three metres long and two metres wide and Jakes’ head kept bumping into the debris above him. They were lucky the wreckage didn’t fall onto them, it was probably blocked by some other item._

_Morse kept fiddling with his shirt and thumbs, looking up anxiously and staying very still. They were both quiet for some time until Jakes began to feel light-headed. He groaned slightly and leaned against the protruding rocks, looking for support even though it felt like they were stabbing his back. He could feel the cool trickle of blood as it ran down his face and slid down his neck, staining his shirt._

_Morse reached out and pressed his handkerchief against Jakes’ forehead, giving him a weak smile. Jakes accepted the gesture and asked Morse if he thought they’d be able to get out._

_“Yes. Thursday will come for us.”_

_Jakes nodded and he suddenly felt an overwhelming urge to kiss Morse. He leaned towards him and tentatively asked him, “Morse, would you be alright if I kissed you?”_

_Morse was shocked, his eyes widening and Jakes immediately felt embarrassed and turned away from him._

_To his surprise, Morse grabbed his wrist and pulled him into a kiss. It was gentle and soothing and Jakes felt himself melt into it. It was like all the stress and tension had left his body at that moment._

_Dry lips met the other’s smooth plump ones and Morse ran his tongue over Jakes’ and his hands clutched the taller man’s face, rubbing the dirt and dust off it and running his fingers through his dark brown hair._

_It was heaven. Jakes wrapped his arms around Morse’s waist and held him close, feeling his heartbeat and relishing in the quickness of his pulse. He was enjoying it._

_When they parted, Morse was bright red and they burst out laughing for a short period of time before coughing because they inhaled too much dust while doing so._

_“That was nice,” Morse commented._

_Jakes grinned and agreed with him. They sat next to each other, falling asleep on each other’s shoulder and only awoke when small rays of sunlight peeked through the cracks. Saved._

*

Today, they were going to get married. They had been waiting for this day for the longest time. It was Jakes who had proposed to Morse and he was overjoyed when the answer was yes.

He had not seen Morse yet and he ran his hand through his hair one last time to neaten it before leaving for the garden they had planned to meet in.

It was gorgeous. The place was decorated with white flowers and although only a few people were sitting in the benches, Jakes felt butterflies in his stomach and he waited for Morse to arrive. When he did, his jaw dropped.

His lover was in a perfectly tailored grey suit, with a white rose pinned to his breast pocket. He looked so beautiful. The two men blushed when they saw one another and the ceremony proceeded.

They didn’t need a priest and the two of them held hands and confessed their love for the other. Morse’s eyes were glistening with tears when Jakes slipped the ring onto his finger. 

The people in the benches included Thursday and Bright, along with some other members of the Cowley station. They stood up and began to clap for the pair and Jakes sighed contentedly. He kissed Morse passionately and they gazed into each other’s eyes, embracing tightly and relishing the other’s presence.

This was the happiest day of his life. It was incredible, he never imagined he would get married to someone, or that he would be so fortunate to have met Morse.

Jakes closed his eyes and when they opened...he realised he was laying in his apartment, fully clothed and tangled in his sheets. He sat up, looking around the room and at the side of his bed. Empty.

His face fell and he got out of bed. It was just a dream. His heart cried out because it was not the first time he had had this dream. It had only been a few days since they were trapped under the rubble but unfortunately, they did not share any secret kisses. They didn’t get married either.

He washed his face, staring at his reflection. A weary man gazed back at him and Jakes left the bathroom, horribly upset. He was so healthy and happy in his dream, handsome and pretty. Now, he looked like a train had hit him over and over again.

How could he ever tell Morse he liked him? He grabbed his coat and left the apartment, slamming the door angrily. 

He hated himself. He hated his appearance, he hated his lack of confidence, he hated everything.

If only Morse reciprocated his feelings. Little did he know the other man shared the exact same thoughts. They’d have to see what would happen next.

_It was just a dream  
But ain't it pretty to think so?  
It was just a dream,  
And I was pretty.  
It was just a dream...  
Oh pity!_

**Author's Note:**

> Whoops. This was meant to be a fluffy happy fic but I needed some angst. Maybe one day I'll write a proper marriage fic :)
> 
> Hope you liked the fic, leave a comment and kudos if you did! Feedback is appreciated.


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